Крысы плывут по кругу

U Natashi vse khorosho: ona pishet dissertat͡sii͡u, rabotaet vmeste s muzhem v biologicheskom institute. Mnogie ne otkazalisʹ by ot takoĭ zhizni. Vot tolʹko nochʹi͡u eĭ sni͡atsi͡a sny o tom, kak ona sama plyvet vmeste s krysami v bakakh laboratorii, otchai͡anno perebirai͡a lapkami, poka khvataet sil. Okazyvaetsi͡a, Natasha ne khotela postupatʹ na biofak, - za nee vse reshila mama. Mamy bolʹshe net, no estʹ muzh, kotoryĭ schitaet ee tvorcheskie uvlechenii͡a balovstvom i naprasnoĭ tratoĭ deneg. Natasha vidit sebi͡a fotografom, odnako zvuchit sekundomer, i nado plytʹ dalʹshe - i tak do beskonechnosti. No, bytʹ mozhet, na ocherednom krugu ėtogo besposhchadnogo zaplyva u Natashi otkroetsi͡a vtoroe dykhanie i poi͡avi͡atsi͡a sily skazatʹ: "I͡A tak bolʹshe ne khochu!"Iskupitelʹnyĭ roman o poiske smyslov, zveni͡ashchem odinochestve i neli͡ubvi - prezhde vsego, k samoĭ sebe; a eshche o tom, chto nikogda ne pozdno prervatʹ neskonchaemui͡u gonku i zani͡atʹsi͡a tem, o chem vsegda mechtala.

Natasha is doing well.: She is writing her dissertation and is working with her husband at the biological institute. Many people would not give up such a life. But at night she dreams of herself swimming with the rats in the tanks of the laboratory, desperately moving her paws as long as she has enough strength. It turns out that Natasha didn't want to go to the biology department, her mother decided everything for her. Mom is no longer there, but there is a husband who considers her creative hobbies to be pampering and a waste of money. Natasha sees herself as a photographer, but the stopwatch sounds, and she has to keep swimming — and so on indefinitely. But perhaps, on the next round of this ruthless swim, Natasha will get a second wind and have the strength to say: "I don't want to do this anymore!"A redemptive novel about the search for meaning, ringing loneliness and dislike — first of all, for oneself; and also about the fact that it's never too late to break off the endless race and do what you've always dreamed of.